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Claire's Story

Claire is a happy fun loving person but during her younger years she never felt settled the grass is always greener philosophy.    She always talked about going to Australia.    She went to University and moved away for four years and got a degree in nursing but still she felt there was something missing.  She moved back to Warwickshire and got a job at the local hospital and following a rotation she decided to work in the A & E Department and for a while she was happy she had a job she loved and started to settle down.  BUT Australia was always in the back of her mind.

Unfortunately in 2001 sadly my mother Joy died on my son Adrian's 30^th Birthday Claire as well as her other three grand children Adrian, Matthew and Mark who were all very close to her and she left a great hole in our lives.  My father Bill had died in October 1989.   The following year we had a Memorial Service for her at our local church on which would have been her 79^th birthday 17^th November.  

The following day Mark my sister Dawn's youngest son, Claire's cousin to whom she was especially close, was found dead in his bedroom of Sudden Adult Death Syndrome.  Once more our family reeled from the shock of losing another dear member of our family but especially as Mark was only 25 years old.  No cause could be found for Mark,s death other than SADS.

Claire, along with the whole family, suffered very badly from our bereavement.  This was the spurt she needed she was definitely going to go to Australia!   She felt she had nothing to lose.   This happened the following year in 2003.  She got together all the equipment she needed to go back packing and off she went alone!  Saying good bye to our only daughter at Heathrow Airport was the worst thing apart from losing our parents - we have ever had to go through and I cried all the way home.

She flew first to Singapore where Claire made friends with another older lady who was going to Australia to family she had there. In Singapore she travelled around sight seeing.  During the day she developed a blister on the side of both feet but she thought nothing of it.

From Singapore she flew to Perth where she met up with another lone back packer called Jo who was also on her flight but she hadn't known this at the time.  If we had known she wasn't alone we may not have worried so much.   They stayed for a while in Freemantle and then travelled up towards Darwin via Broome.   During the trip up north she was went on a trip to the outback, sand surfing and abseiling.  However during this last activity she cut her left shin on a stick.  She dressed and cleaned this herself.   She also went scuba diving but unfortunately she failed because she suffered from breathing problems.

However during the coach ride up to Broome Claire felt that her rings were getting tight and she mentioned this to another girl travelling with them to Darwin.  The wound on her leg became necrotic, was enlarging and had an infected smell to it.   By the time they got to her Broome Claire also felt slightly breathless and got herself to the local A & E department.  

At the department Claire was found to be in early renal failure and she was admitted.  It turned out that Claire who had sustained a blister in Singapore had picked up a bug that had attacked her kidneys.    Her kidneys started to go into retention and she did not pass enough urine which worried the doctors.   The doctors liaised with a specialist in the renal unit at the Royal Hospital in Perth.  After two or three days they were concerned enough about Claire to fly her to The Royal Hospital in Perth.  She had glomerulonephritis and pneumonia.

She had to undergo a kidney biopsy.

We were fortunate in that a friend had given Claire an Australian mobile phone and we were able to contact her often taking into account the time difference.    She phoned home and told us what had happened and naturally we were very worried especially as she was on her own.  She had told her friends to carry on with their journey as there was nothing they could do and they would waste their time but this left Claire alone and anxious as to what was going to happen to her.

Before Claire left for Australia  she left a copy of her insurance documents thank goodness she got insurance - and we phoned Direct Line.  They were absolutely fantastic.  They brought up her policy on their computer system and immediately took over her care.  They phoned Claire and put her mind at ease and kept us informed almost daily.  We were also lucky in the fact that we had two friends who were visiting their family in Perth at the time and they were able to go and see Claire and of course phoned us to inform us of her condition � which was reassuring.

After two weeks Claire was getting better but was unable to travel as her saturations were down.  Direct Line flew out a nurse to look after her and to organise her flight home.  She needed oxygen for the trip and this also had to be monitored.   She flew first class (although she couldn''t enjoy it as she was feeling very uncomfortable and not really eating very much).   From Heathrow there was a private ambulance waiting for Claire and her nurse and they were then driven home straight to our door.

We were never so pleased to see her safely back home so we could care for her and give her the tlc she deserved.

She went on to a make a full recovery and she wrote to Direct Line to thank them for their help and care at time when it was needed most, but there was still this niggle at the back of Claire's mind that she hadn't really finished her Australian trip after all she had only been out of this country for six weeks and had to be flown home again.  She had planned to be away for twelve months!  

Needless to say Claire saved up and went back to Australia in February 2004. This time she went to Sydney with her friend Lisa who had friends in Sydney and Claire and she also met up with an old friend who had emigrated there.  Lisa stayed for three weeks with Claire and they had a lovely time and was shown the local sites by Lisa's friends.  However Lisa had to go home and although Claire's new found friends asked her to stay with them she felt she must make her way herself.

Claire worked as a nurse working for Nurse Worldwide in Sydney for three months first staying in a hostel and then she shared an apartment in Sydney with other back packers near Rock.   After three months Claire felt she needed to take off again and made her way up the Gold Coast.  One of her stops was Townsville.   She had made friends with other back packers and met up again with Jo.   They went on a trip to Magnetic Island where they had planned to hire sand buggies and enjoy this lovely island.  Unfortunately luck was again not on Claire's side.   She hadn�'been there long before she felt unwell and began experiencing chest pains and thought she was about to have a heart attack!  Again she was taken by ambulance to the local GP run Clinic and from there was airlifted back to the mainland to Townsville General Hospital where she was admitted.   Claire was diagnosed as having pancreatitis a condition usually caused by having gall stones.  Investigations were carried out and it was felt that she had a gall stone and after taking advice removal of her gallbladder was decided upon.    This way she wouldn't have any more problems with her pancreas or so we thought!  Unfortunately she also developed a left pleural effusion.

Again we phoned Direct Line (as she had re-insured herself with them) and our minds were put at rest although we would dearly have loved to have been with her at this awful time.   She had to undergo a cholecystectomy by keyhole surgery.   Again her friends came to visit her at first but they had their own trip to complete and Claire told them to go on without her. 

She was befriended by one of the domestics on the ward who brought her flowers but it wasn't quite the same as having family or friends looking out for you and I am sure Claire felt at an all time low.  We were again able to phone her direct to her bedside by using the hospital patient line system.  This we did every day to keep her chin up.

She went on to make a good recovery from her surgery and again Direct Line were there for her phoning her and informing her of their plans.  This was that on discharge from hospital she was to have at least ten days to convalesce after the operation before she could be flown home.  It was felt that because of her training there would be no need for a nurse to be flown out to look after her and she was booked in to the Holiday Inn in a suite.   She spent most days lazing on the beach (which sounds lovely but not on your own perhaps) and wishing of course that she could carry on with her journey.   The time came when she was to be flown home a taxi was ordered to take her to the airport where she was flown first class.  Before the flight Claire had to give herself an injection to ensure she suffered no blood clots. 

Again she was met at Heathrow airport and brought home again safe to us.

Well that put paid to any thoughts of her going back to Australia as we felt her third time might not be lucky for her.

After a period of convalescence Claire needed to get back to work and worked as a Bank nurse at Good Hope Hospital until a permanent position became available in the A & E Department.  Claire applied for an E grade position but because she had had a break in nursing (they did not recognise the time she had actually worked in Australia or the fact that she had worked as a bank nurse in A & E in Good Hope Hospital she did not get the job even though she had previously worked there for three years!  Claire felt let down by that hospital where her friends still worked and where she felt she could be an asset to them and had previously been happy there.  This was a very traumatic time for Claire as she felt she had been made a fool of by the management.  Claire ceased working at Good Hope Hospital on the bank to keep her dignity and self respect.   She felt that if they didn't appreciate her experience then she would go where she would be appreciated. Claire felt betrayed.

 It was time to move on she applied for other positions and in the end was able to choose from two positions at two different hospitals.  After great deliberations she took a position at Walsgrave Hospital now called University Hospital Coventry and Warwickshire.

 For the first two or three months Claire wasn't really happy there, she felt unsettled.  She wondered whether or not to stay and started looking round for another position elsewhere.    However in time she started making some really good friends and eventually settled into her new life in Coventry.

 BUT like Jaws all was not OK and Claire went on to suffer many further attacks of pancreatitis necessitating admission to local hospitals at different times.   She was referred to a hospital in Nuneaton for a second opinion but the consultant felt she was referred inappropriately Claire felt really low at this time as she was hopeful that she would find an answer as to why she had some many episodes of pancreatitis.   After one admission to a hospital in Nuneaton the consultant told her that she shouldn't have been under his care as he was a colorectal surgeon (even though was admitted under him as it was his team on call on the day of her admission!)   We did complain about his attitude but we heard nothing further. 

 Pancreatitis is caused by having gall stones and of course by drinking heavily.  Claire although did like the occasional glass of wine was not a heavy drinker and no-one could find a reason for these attacks which rendered Claire in a great deal of pain and a couple of weeks of convalescence.   She also worried constantly about her job and whether they would ask her to leave because of her sick leave.  

 Last year Claire suffered at least six attacks of pancreatitis some she was able to alleviate quickly by self medicating with pain killers and fluids.   However she was having attacks every six weeks or so.

 However following her admission in Nuneaton we asked her GP to refer her to a specialist consultant in pancreatitis in Leicester General Hospital- Mr Ashley Dennison.  We were told if he couldn't help Claire no-one could.

 Mr Dennison discussed Claire's history with her and then decided to take some base line blood tests and to attend for a scan.   He wished to see her with these results in January.   This did not take place.

 Unfortunately after Claire had worked nights last year including  New Years Eve she was invited along with my husband and I and his father to have dinner at her brother Adrian's house.   It was a happy occasion especially for me as I just love having my family around me.  Claire left at around 6 o'clock as she was tired from her previous night at work.   The next day was a work day and we all went home.

 I was getting ready for work the following morning 2^nd January 2007 when Claire phoned to say she was having another attack of pancreatitis.  Here we go again!   I sped over to her house to take her into hospital we both knew the routine having done this so many times.  This time we chose the hospital where she worked (as she now was living in Coventry) as at least they could see how poorly she was and I hoped it would make Claire feel relaxed and unconcerned about having more time off work. 

We went through the usual routine by this time I knew the routine well and could tell any junior doctor what to do (which of course I didn't).   She was seen straight away and had bloods taken, blood pressure etc and given morphine which is the only drug that takes away the pain although not completely and then put on intravenous fluid.   Usually the pain is eased with the morphine and she is monitored carefully as to how much she needs.  However this time the usual amount did not work and Claire was really suffering and her dose was raised quite dramatically compared to previous admissions at least up to five times compared to previous times!

 After a few hours a bed was found for her on a ward and although she was still in pain we hoped this would settle in time.   I telephone my husband Alan and he met us on the ward.   We left her at around 9 o'clock but still felt uneasy as her pain was not really abating but visiting time was officially well over and patients were settling down for the night.

 Alan and I went home with heavy hearts but found we just could not relax.   I phoned the hospital around 10.30 pm to see how she was and the nurse told us that the doctors were with her.  This rang alarm bells why were they with her?  What was wrong?  I asked if we could see her as we were only local (a lie) but we needed to see her.   Reluctantly she said we could come and arrangements were made with the reception staff to expect us.

 On our arrival the receptionist phoned the ward and was told to let us up.  The nurse I had previously spoken to greeted us and told us that the doctor would like to see us.  Why?  The registrar was lovely but we were nervous.  It became apparent that Claire's pain was not settling and although the staff were good, there were few nurses on duty and the doctor was coming to see her when she could but obviously she had other patients who also needed her attention.   She told us that she was trying to get her a bed in Critical Care as there they had a one-to-one system which Claire apparently needed.   We had not realised at this time that they were becoming very concerned about Claire's condition.

 Claire was so distressed, she was not improving as had previously been the case and was obviously very uncomfortable and in pain.  She had been seen by the Pain Relief Sister who had arranged for Claire to have a PCA (patient controlled analgesia).  I was so glad that I had made that phone call to the hospital but they would have had to call us eventually.

 Time dragged on but eventually the doctor came back to see us and told us that there was a bed for Claire but that she would have to be examined by the doctors from Critical Care to assess her.   I think the waiting is absolutely soul destroying and after what seemed an eternity two doctors came to see Claire and agreed that she should be transferred to Critical Care BUT they then had to phone their consultant to get his approval!  He of course agreed to the transfer.

Claire was taken to Critical Care at around 2 o'clock in the morning.   We were asked to wait in the waiting room while they settled her down and carried out their own procedures.    After what seemed like an eternity the night sister came into Critical Care she knew Claire and came to speak to us.  She like us couldn't believe that Claire had had to be transferred there.  Alan and I were exhausted for me I had spent virtually all that day and evening there.   We decided that we would be no good for anything unless we got some sleep.   It was around 5 o'clock in the morning when we got home and crawled into bed.   I had to set the alarm so that I could telephone my work to inform them of what had happened to Claire.

After some sleep we went back to the hospital for 11 o'clock visiting time.  You soon learn the procedures.   When you arrive in Critical Care you inform the receptionist whom you are visiting and she in turn informs the nurse in charge of the patient.  You are not allowed to take outdoor clothing in through the doors and of course you must wash your hands with the disinfectant supplied.

Claire was in a bay on her own with a very attentive nurse at hand.   She had venflons into her hand by which they were administering her morphine and fluids as and when needed.  She was also on oxygen to help her breathing.

Alan and I stayed with Claire virtually all day � visiting was 11 - 2pm and 4 - 8pm.   So we went to the hospital restaurant and had something to eat and drink between visiting times but as long as we were at the hospital and near Claire we were content.   They also had Alan's mobile phone number just in case.

Again, that night we went home but felt Claire was in the best place and had had really good care.

The next morning after a good night's sleep. Alan went to work feeling that Claire would now be on the mend and Adrian and I went to the hospital.   On arrival in Critical Care � the usual procedure � ask the receptionist to ask the nurse if we could go down and see Claire.   This time however the nurse came up and told us the doctor wanted to see us.  Alarm bells again!!!!  The last time this happened was when we were told my Dad was going to die after a heart attack.   I felt sick.

We were ushered into a side room with the doctor and the nurse who was looking after Claire.   He told us that Claire's condition had got worse and that they were going to have to put her on a ventilator and put in a central line to enable them to administer her drugs.   They were also going to ensure that she was 100% paralysed by the sedation drugs.   Her organs had apparently started to shut down and her body was filling up with fluid and this was making it difficult for Claire to breath.

Adrian and I were stunned.  The doctor asked if we had any questions but we were too shocked to even speak.   He told us that we could see Claire while they made the preparations to sedate and ventilate her.

When we saws Claire her bed had been raised until the bed was formed into an L shape and Claire was sitting upright with oxygen to help her breath.  She was gasping and distraught but the whole situation.    We had ton choke back our tears and say goodbye to Claire and tell her that everything would be OK and when she woke up she would be better if only we could believe that ourselves!  Claire herself was relieved as she was exhausted from trying to breath on her own for so long when her body was fighting back for her to give up.

Adrian and I made it into the corridor outside Critical Care and just cried we felt absolutely helpless and couldn't quite believe what was happening.

We also had to let Alan know who was happily working away thinking Claire was on the mend.  Little did he know.   Obviously he came to the hospital straight away.

The next time we saw Claire was later that day when we were allowed to see her.   She was surrounded by machines a ventilator from which was a tube that was in Claire's lungs to help her breath and in her neck was the central line from which arose 6-8 lines.  These were attached to syringe drivers which were set to administer just the right amount of drugs to keep her pain free and sedated.  Claire lay lifeless on a bed which was also set to move her gently from side to side so as not to create bed sores.  We couldn't believe what had happened to Claire.

Claire remained in critical care for five days after which time they had decided that she could perhaps be brought round from her sedation.  We were warned that if Claire fought against the ventilator she would have to have a tracheotomy introduced to help her breathing.  

Slowly Claire was brought round and the next day we hurried to her bedside as we believed she would be back to normal and would be able to speak to us.

Unfortunately this was not the case.   Because she had been so deeply sedated the process of bringing her round would be slow and in fact it took two days before we could really speak to her and even then she was very restless and didn't know what to do with herself.   She was of course going cold turkey after being on all the drugs including of course morphine.  Her first words were were you here yesterday?  She couldn't quite believe she had been in critical care for five days.

She was eventually transferred to a normal ward and we said goodbye to all the fantastic staff and of course all the other relatives of patients who were in a similar position to Claire and who you get to know.

Eventually Claire had her central line removed and she was discharged home to our house where we could look after her and provide the tlc.  On the morning of her discharge Claire felt she had slept awkwardly on her neck as she said her neck hurt her but we felt this would resolve with time.  This was Monday.  Claire was still in pain the next day and her arm was becoming swollen - she went to see her GP.  She felt that it could possibly be an infection and gave her a course of antibiotics.  By Wednesday Claire was in so much pain with her neck she was having to hold her head as any movement was excruciating.   Her arm also was more swollen.  We took it upon ourselves to take her back via A & E.

Her friends couldn't believe that Claire was once again in trouble.   She was seen by the A & E consultant.   Apparently when a patient has a central line put in as did Claire � the end of this line is sent to the laboratory to see whether any bugs were growing there.  The SHO on duty looked for the result and it showed that she had got a bug and the consultant advised intravenous antibiotics and Claire was admitted overnight onto a short stay ward in A & E.  However the antibiotics did not appear to make any difference to Claire's pain and swelling.   Claire was transferred to a side room in the same ward she was on before her discharge.

By Friday evening the consultant looking after Claire decided to have a scan taken of her neck.   This showed that unfortunately Claire had developed a clot in the subclavian vein which is just behind the collar bone which unfortunately for Claire is an unusual event!  The problem now was how were they going to deal with this.   She was put on another antibiotic which help to clear the infected clot.

As usual in hospital nothing gets done over the weekend unless something urgent crops up.

 The following Monday they discussed Claire's case and made arrangements for the clot to be zapped in radiology with a drug.  Nothing happened that day but the next day Claire was sent to x-ray.  We thought that this would be an end to her problems. BUT the radiologist felt unhappy to carry out this procedure as the resultant small clots could either go into her brain and could cause a stroke, or into her heart and cause a heart attack or into her lung so nothing was done.

 We felt Claire was living with a time bomb her arm was very swollen due to the fact that the clot was preventing the flow of blood into her arm and physiotherapy was suggested.

 Thursday seemed to be the last straw nothing had been done for Claire, she was still on the ward, the physio was off sick so no physio and there Claire stayed.   That evening after visiting Alan and I felt enraged that Claire had sat in that ward and that nothing had been done for her apart from the antibiotics and on occasion that wasn't given as her venflon had blocked (she had had so many by this time that her veins were shutting down) and the doctor couldn't find a vein!   She was however given injections into her stomach to prevent clots forming.  Claire also felt there was something wrong, she had pain in her chest and it was her instigation that a doctor was sent for.

Alan and I went into action; we wrote a list of what had happened to Claire and Alan was determined to see her consultant to get something done.  He left home at 7.15 a.m. on the Friday morning to make sure he was there when everyone arrived.

He was told where her office was he went to see her.  But in true fashion the consultant was at a meeting in Birmingham.  Frustration!!  However her secretary was very helpful and she tried to get in touch with the consultant and left a message on her mobile.   She then arranged for Alan to see the Matron which he did.   Again she was excellent and also enraged that this had happened to Claire and more especially as she was actually a member of their staff!

Alan left to see Claire to tell her what he had done.  From that time onwards things started happening.   Doctor came round to see Claire and she was sent for another scan, the physio turned up and the consultant's secretary met Alan on the ward to inform him that he had an appointment with the consultant at 2.00 pm.  

Alan came home and we went back to the hospital later that day for our appointment with the consultant.  She informed us that they had had a meeting about Claire and had decided not zap the clot but that she would be put on warfarin which would hopefully thin the clot and this would eventually disperse.  The main problem appeared to be that Claire was not on her vascular ward and we think she was just forgotten!  It got to the stage where there was always a doctor or someone with Claire talk about attention!

Claire was discharged on 1^st February 2007.  What a month she had had as had we.   She came home her arm still swollen but she carried on with her own physio.   Today it isn't swollen but tends to swell if she overdoes things.   Her subclavian vein is still blocked but she has other small veins they are called collateral - veins  opening up and in time will take the place of the blocked vein.

Claire went back for an appointment with Mr Dennison in Leicester.  He had received a report from the events that had taken place at the beginning of the New Year.   He also commented upon the fact that Claire's triglycerides were high at the time of her admission. This was also mentioned by the critical care team who felt this was probably the result rather than the cause of her pancreatitis.  However Mr Dennison felt that this could possibly be Claire's problems.  Her lipids were measured and found to be high again and Mr Dennison suggested she went on a statin to lower her lipids.   He asked to see her again in ten weeks time by which time Claire is running true to form she should have had another admission. If this is not the case then he feels he may have found the cause for her pancreatitis.

She is due to see Mr Dennison again soon and we are hoping that her lipids have come down and at last we may have found a cause for all her problems.  If not, it may be that Claire will have to have part of her pancreas removed but we will wait and see.

For Claire the pancreatitis is in abeyance but if she wants to take a holiday abroad an insurance company may not be keen to insure her with her history but we will of course use Direct Line as they have not failed her in the past but of course we will always be on tenterhooks that she may have another attack but you can't live your life wondering 'what if?  Claire must lead her life as normal as possible but hopefully pancreatitis for Claire could be a thing of the past.

Her right arm is slightly larger than her left arm due mainly to the clot in her subclavian vein which caused the problem in the first place, and after a long day at work her arm does feel firm.  Hopefully in the future this will go back to normal.   She takes warfarin daily to thin her blood but this too seems unwilling to settle.  Her INR is up and down and it is hard to know what dose of warfarin she should be taking.  This of course is checked weekly.

We just hope that Claire's life may now run smoothly and that she has all good luck from now on - after all she has had enough bad luck to last a life time.  Alan and I just hope that she never wants to go back to Australia lovely as it is but Claire has a really bad track record and we just feel that a third time may be really unlucky!

Claire's happy go lucky personality has been given so many knocks and who can say they wouldn't be affected under the same circumstances.  One thing we can say is that Claire has put up with a lot in the last few weeks especially but she has never moaned.  I feel very proud of Claire - I just don't think I would have been so calm especially when she had to sustain so many injections etc for this that and the other.

EPILOGUE

Two weeks ago (5^th June) Claire had a mini attack of pancreatitis but fortunately she was able to self medicate and the attack eventually settled.

We felt that if this was what is going to happen in the future then we would be very happy especially after the last attack.

However only fairy stories have a happy ending.  On the 18^th June Claire went to work on a day shift something she was not looking forward to.

She clocked watched until her alarm went off anxious not to be late for her first day shift.   All went well, the morning went well but a little while later the old feeling of pain rose its ugly head.  She self medicated for as long as she could until she could bear the pain no longer and informed the sister in A & E.  She placed Claire in a cubicle and started the process of monitoring her pain, taking blood, giving her morphine to stop the pain.    This was when a phone call was made to our home to go to the hospital.   I found her not too bad but in pain.

A bed was found for Claire in a side room on ward 33 and after settling Claire down on Claire's instructions she sent me home. I left at around 10.30 and went home with a heavy heart but felt reassured by Claire that this attack was not as bad her last one.

Alan and I were awoken the next morning at around 5.15am by Claire's friend Becky who had been with Claire all night.   She condition was becoming worrying and the staff pushed for a bed in critical care.   When Alan and I got there they were just pushing Claire's bed in and after settling her down we were allowed in to see her.

Claire was sitting up in bed obviously in pain but surrounded but monitors that were giving her the medication she needed.  However Claire's pain did not ease and after giving her a large amount of morphine and IV paracetamol.  Claire was in such discomfort with the pain and grimaced when the pain obviously got too much for her.   The doctors decided that it would be a good idea to get a CT scan for Claire to see what was going on in her pancreas.  For this they felt it would be better for her to be sedated and put on a ventilator.  Alan and I decided to go to Claire's flat and the nurse said she would contact us there.   She did not long after we got there they asked us to go back to the ward.   We phoned Adrian and suggested he should be at the hospital with us.

We got to the ward and Claire was now fully sedated and was unconscious.  The machines were doing their job by pumping in medication to keep her asleep, ensuring she had analgesia on tap and that she was breathing easily.  It was like being at a space station with all the machinery.

Her CT scan was inconclusive but felt that she had a haemorrhage as her blood count had fallen from 14 to 7 and because of all the warfarin she had been taking for the blood clot in her subclavian vein the haemorrhage was not clotting.   She was given a blood transfusion together with blood products to help her clotting.  Nothing seemed to help, her blood pressure was coming down to a critical figure and the doctors and staff were clearly concerned at Claire's deterioration.

We were taken into a room for a discussion with the A  & E consultant.  He informed us that everything was being done to help Claire but it wasn't looking too good and we were given the worse scenario possible.   It seemed that all the drugs given to Claire to keep her blood pressure up were not making any difference and it seemed that we were slowly losing our lovely Claire.

Her friends from A & E came in to see her and we were asked if there was any one that should be there we called in Dawn my sister.  She arrived with her son Matthew, Claire's cousin.   We watched Claire, touched her, stroked her hair and told her how much we loved her and that she would remain in our hearts forever. Her friend also came in to see her and say their goodbye's everyone in a complete state of shock at what was happening to Claire.

Slowly Claire's  heart gave out and the nurse came in to tell us that she had gone from us. Nooo  this could not be happening our lovely daughter,  sister, niece and cousin had died in front of our eyes.  It felt like a nightmare.

She died at 8.40 p.m. on Tuesday 19^th June even writing this down felt like I was talking about someone else, not Claire, not our daughter, my friend, the person who would be with us until the end of our days!

We moved away from Claire, the nurse asked if we would like to come back when she had seen to Claire and removed tubes, machines etc that had been keeping her alive.   We all left after saying good bye to Claire's friends and promising to keep in touch.

We went off for a coffee and talked about what had just happened.   When we went back to the ward Claire looked lovely still very bloated but lovely.   We all spoke to her gently, quietly and again said our good bye's.  Then the nurse asked if we would like a lock of her hair.  We jumped at the chance of being able to look and touch something of  Claire when she had gone from us.

Claire never realised just how loved she was by all she came into contact with, the security staff and car parking assistants who helped find her car in the car park, her friends and colleagues in the A & E department even the staff in the bereavement office said that Claire's death had been like a shockwave running through the hospital it had affected everyone so much.

Next week we will celebrate Claire's life and not one day will go by when we don't think about her, talk about her and wish she was still with us.   We love you Claire and always will.  Until we meet again in heaven God Bless you Claire and keep you safe.   Sweet dreams.

Mom, Dad and Adrian.

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